DID I MARRY THE RIGHT PERSON?
During one of our seminars, a woman asked a common question. She said,
"How do I know if I married the right person?"
I noticed that there was a large man sitting next to her so I said, "It
depends. Is that your husband?" In all seriousness, she answered "How
do you know?"
Let me answer this question because the chances are good that it's
weighing on your mind. Here's the answer.
EVERY relationship has a cycle. In the beginning, you fell in love with
your spouse. You anticipated their call, wanted their touch, and liked
their idiosyncrasies. Falling in love with your spouse wasn't hard. In
fact, it was a completely natural and spontaneous experience. You
didn't have to do anything. That's why it's called "falling" in love...
Because it's happening TO YOU. People in love sometimes say, "I was
swept of my feet." Think about the Imagery of that expression. It
implies that you were just standing there doing nothing, and then
something came along and happened TO YOU.
Falling in love is easy. It's a passive and spontaneous experience. But
after a few years of marriage, the euphoria of love fades. It's the
natural cycle of EVERY relationship. Slowly but surely, phone calls
become a bother (if they come at all), touch is not always welcome
(when it happens), and your spouse's idiosyncrasies, instead of being
cute, drive you nuts. The symptoms of this stage vary with every
relationship, but if you think about your marriage, you will notice a
dramatic difference between the initial stage when you were in love and
a much duller or even angry subsequent stage. At this point, you and/or
your spouse might start asking, "Did I marry the right person?" And as
you and your spouse reflect on the euphoria of the love you once had,
you may begin to desire that experience with someone else. This is when
marriages breakdown.
People blame their spouse for their unhappiness and look outside their
marriage for fulfillment. Extramarital fulfillment comes in all shapes
and sizes. Infidelity is the most obvious. But sometimes people turn to
work, church, a hobby, a friendship, excessive TV, or abusive
substances. But the answer to this dilemma does NOT lie outside your
marriage. It lies within it. I'm not saying that you couldn't fall in
love with someone else. You could. And TEMPORARILY you'd feel better.
But you'd be in the same situation a few years later. Because (listen
carefully to this):
THE KEY TO SUCCEEDING IN MARRIAGE IS NOT FINDING THE RIGHT PERSON; IT'S
LEARNING TO LOVE THE PERSON YOU FOUND.
SUSTAINING love is not a passive or spontaneous experience. It'll NEVER
just happen to you. You can't "find" LASTING love. You have to "make"
it, day in and day out. That's why we have the expression "the labor of
love." Because it takes time, effort, and energy. And most
importantly, it Takes WISDOM. You have to know WHAT TO DO to make your
marriage work.
Make no mistake about it. Love is NOT a mystery. There are specific
things you can do (with or without your spouse) to succeed with your
marriage.
Just as there are physical laws of the universe (such as gravity),
there are also laws for relationships. Just as the right diet and
exercise program makes you physically stronger, certain habits in your
relationship WILL make your marriage stronger. It's a direct cause and
effect. If you know and apply the laws, the results are predictable...
You can "make" love.
Love in marriage is indeed a "decision"... Not just a feeling.
insightful.
makes sense. (:
Wah. Good.
Fall...ing in love ~
Man if only more couples realised this before they rushed to the altar....we might have more happy marriages...and goodness knows maybe even our birth rate would not be so dismal. Im sure our government would be very glad.
Love must also be accompanied by money.
Nobody can live on love and fresh air alone.
Really.
Dating brings out the best,marriage brings out the rest.
Marriage is grand.
Divorce is a hundred grand.
There is no right or wrong.
Originally posted by seotiblizzard:There is no right or wrong.
Of course there is.
A man only needs to know these 6 words to have a happy marriage with his wife:
" You are right, I am wrong"
Based on my personal experience...you will never really know until you die...or get divorced, which ever comes first.
awesomeness need not be taught. . . .
Love Is A Habit You Never Grow Out Of.
The moral of the story is simple:
This couple had been dating for about six months, but the guy had been afraid to make any sexual advances because of his tiny organ.
Finally one night, he gets up his courage, and takes her to a secluded spot in his car.
While they are kissing, he opens his zipper and guides her hand onto his penis.
"No thanks," the girl says. "You know I don't smoke."
Originally posted by soleachip:The moral of the story is simple:
This couple had been dating for about six months, but the guy had been afraid to make any sexual advances because of his tiny organ.
Finally one night, he gets up his courage, and takes her to a secluded spot in his car.
While they are kissing, he opens his zipper and guides her hand onto his penis.
"No thanks," the girl says. "You know I don't smoke."
But I'd rather "learn to love" a hot babe, than an ugly woman :)
Originally posted by Go:DID I MARRY THE RIGHT PERSON?
During one of our seminars, a woman asked a common question. She said,
"How do I know if I married the right person?"
I noticed that there was a large man sitting next to her so I said, "It
depends. Is that your husband?" In all seriousness, she answered "How
do you know?"
Let me answer this question because the chances are good that it's
weighing on your mind. Here's the answer.
EVERY relationship has a cycle. In the beginning, you fell in love with
your spouse. You anticipated their call, wanted their touch, and liked
their idiosyncrasies. Falling in love with your spouse wasn't hard. In
fact, it was a completely natural and spontaneous experience. You
didn't have to do anything. That's why it's called "falling" in love...
Because it's happening TO YOU. People in love sometimes say, "I was
swept of my feet." Think about the Imagery of that expression. It
implies that you were just standing there doing nothing, and then
something came along and happened TO YOU.
Falling in love is easy. It's a passive and spontaneous experience. But
after a few years of marriage, the euphoria of love fades. It's the
natural cycle of EVERY relationship. Slowly but surely, phone calls
become a bother (if they come at all), touch is not always welcome
(when it happens), and your spouse's idiosyncrasies, instead of being
cute, drive you nuts. The symptoms of this stage vary with every
relationship, but if you think about your marriage, you will notice a
dramatic difference between the initial stage when you were in love and
a much duller or even angry subsequent stage. At this point, you and/or
your spouse might start asking, "Did I marry the right person?" And as
you and your spouse reflect on the euphoria of the love you once had,
you may begin to desire that experience with someone else. This is when
marriages breakdown.
People blame their spouse for their unhappiness and look outside their
marriage for fulfillment. Extramarital fulfillment comes in all shapes
and sizes. Infidelity is the most obvious. But sometimes people turn to
work, church, a hobby, a friendship, excessive TV, or abusive
substances. But the answer to this dilemma does NOT lie outside your
marriage. It lies within it. I'm not saying that you couldn't fall in
love with someone else. You could. And TEMPORARILY you'd feel better.
But you'd be in the same situation a few years later. Because (listen
carefully to this):
THE KEY TO SUCCEEDING IN MARRIAGE IS NOT FINDING THE RIGHT PERSON; IT'S
LEARNING TO LOVE THE PERSON YOU FOUND.
SUSTAINING love is not a passive or spontaneous experience. It'll NEVER
just happen to you. You can't "find" LASTING love. You have to "make"
it, day in and day out. That's why we have the expression "the labor of
love." Because it takes time, effort, and energy. And most
importantly, it Takes WISDOM. You have to know WHAT TO DO to make your
marriage work.
Make no mistake about it. Love is NOT a mystery. There are specific
things you can do (with or without your spouse) to succeed with your
marriage.
Just as there are physical laws of the universe (such as gravity),
there are also laws for relationships. Just as the right diet and
exercise program makes you physically stronger, certain habits in your
relationship WILL make your marriage stronger. It's a direct cause and
effect. If you know and apply the laws, the results are predictable...
You can "make" love.
Love in marriage is indeed a "decision"... Not just a feeling.
Very good article from u, I cldnt agree more.
But still, it takes BOTH parties to understand that theory to make it work. Sad to say, not many couples realise that simultaneously.
Originally posted by RedizAlertz:Very good article from u, I cldnt agree more.
But still, it takes BOTH parties to understand that theory to make it work. Sad to say, not many couples realise that simultaneously.
Can I just have a small correction here? This article is not by the TS.
The original writer of this article which was originally stated in the original post before it was edited...I wonder why did he take the name of the author out..